(belated Thursday post!) It's one of those days...

...that you hope you remember for a long time after it's gone.

Two of my friends kind-of got together (it's high school), and one of those friends, after a certain complicated chain of events, came out to his parents, though not mentioning that "There's a cute boy in my life and we're thinking of going steady."

Coming out to family is intense. You don't know how they'll react, you don't know what to say or not say. My friend, as with all things, dealt with it with courage and wisdom beyond his age. I'm dreadfully proud of him.

I've been a part of this romantic comedy craziness since the beginning; heck, I was there when these guys met. I feel blessed to have been able to be a witness and a guide to my dear friends, and I wish the absolute best for them in their coming adventures. Much love to R.M. and C.U. <3

(I wrote this out late last night on my phone, but for some reason, I had no internet connection, so I had to wait until today to post it.)

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The Problem with Being a F*g Hag

SO MUCH GAY DRAMA.

Ugh. I can't handle it.

Then again, it's not like I'm doing anything to avoid it.

...here's some Margaret Cho:

Sex vs. Gender

This is everything I've wanted to say whenever someone mixes up "gender" and "sex," and assumes there's only two of each. I just needed to let it all out.

“Say No to Gender!”

Such were the words which spawned a great discussion/debate on my friend’s Facebook page recently. There seemed to be a great deal of confusion over what gender even was, much less whether it was important to preserve or just eradicate completely.
In my years as a budding gay rights activist, I’ve learned a fair amount about what gender truly IS, and, based on my friend’s discussion and the confusion of other friends and family, I’d like to take this time to explain my understanding of…

SEX!

No, not that kind of sex. Get your mind out of the gutter.

Isn’t gender just male and female?

Nope. That’s sex. And even sex isn’t limited to the binary of “male” and “female”. That excludes the entire group of people known as “intersex” (you might know them as “hermaphrodites,” but that term is falling out of use in the queer community).

The issue with explaining gender and sex is that, for the longest time in Western society, there’s been a binary. You’re either male or female, masculine or feminine. More specifically, you were either a masculine man or a feminine woman. Anything else, and you were a freak. At the very least, shunned by society, but often worse.

Neither sex nor gender fits into a binary, and it’s important to allow one’s mind to stretch to accommodate the great variety of ways people define and express themselves through their gender presentation.

Okay… so what’s the difference?

SEX is biological, genetic, and hormonal. You have a certain set of sex chromosomes at birth, be they XX, XY, XXY, XYY, or any other combination (of course, XX and XY are the most common). Also, when you’re a fetus developing inside your mother, certain hormones kick in at a particular point in the pregnancy which, usually, cause you to develop all of the biological aspects of your sex, aka, your man- or lady-parts. During a pregnancy, many things can happen wherein a person’s mind develops as one sex but their body is another, or they are genetically one sex but develop physically as another. These are the people who are classed as “intersex”.

GENDER is how one presents oneself in relation to their sex, society, and self-perception. Common genders are masculine, feminine, and androgynous, but there are others, as well. Gender and sex *sometimes* match up (masculine males and feminine females), but other times, they really don’t. Sex only determines a person’s gender to a point, and sometimes, it doesn’t at all.

A sex/gender disparity is more common than you think. I’ll use my dear sister as an example. She’s straight and female, but her gender is neither particularly feminine nor particularly masculine- she’s androgynous. (I, on the other hand, am a feminine female- my sex affects my gender enough that there’s little to no disparity. I do enjoy presenting myself in a more masculine manner on occasion, but I am on average feminine.) It’s perfectly normal, and it in no way affects her sexual orientation.

Why is this all so complicated?

This is probably why the binary was so rigidly enforced in the past. Once male/female and masculine/feminine are shown to be the tip of a convoluted iceberg, one wishes that life was simpler.

It's just that, as people become more open about their unique sex or gender, it becomes clear that the binary is artificial, and sometimes even harmful. When your options in life are masculine male and feminine female, that leaves anyone who falls outside the norm to be an outcast. It's like when people could finally be open about their sexual orientation (if it wasn't straight) and all of a sudden we're realizing that there's no black-and-white. You're not fully gay or fully straight. More often than not, you're a mix of both.

What is one to do with all of this information?

Think about it. Reflect on it. Maybe it'll help change your perspective, or maybe it'll just confuse you more.

Regardless, I encourage all of you to do research on this. The difference between sex and gender is a huge deal in the transgender community, as well as the queer community at large. The more we educate ourselves, the easier it'll be for others to be educated in the future.

The challenge of the blogging challenge...

...is that I can't write out longer, more impressive entries more often.

I will, however, provide a preview for tomorrow's entry: a sort-of essay on the idea of sex, gender, the difference between the two, and the importance of each.

Until tomorrow, then, check out my new favorite "It Gets Better" video from Dan Savage's anti-gay suicide campaign:

Once more into the fray...

and thus, another week of school begins for this blogger.

it sucks that i cant capitalize or use more punctuation when blogging from my phone.

stupid phone. xp

A Global What-Now?

Instead of quotes this time, I just want to say this: Never did I believe that we'd reach a point in 21st century America that a man would go out and shoot a congressperson, her aides, a judge, and innocent bystanders at a political event meant to bridge the gap between politicians and their constituents. It made me sick to hear about Rep. Giffords' near-assassination. I was very impressed to see how Keith Olbermann used the incident to start a dialogue on the increased usage of casual threats of violence in politics, and their unintended consequences. I feel a bit better now. Also, I baked brownies.

I started out this blog with the idea of, as it says above, "chronicling my journey towards becoming a global citizen".

Well, what exactly does that mean? What does it MEAN to be a citizen of the whole world?

What does Wikipedia say?

The final authority on everything has a fair amount to say on the idea of global citizenship. Two things stand out to me. The first is a quote from British author Thomas Paine:

"My country is the world, and my religion is to do good."

I like that. It's snappy.

Second is what immediately follows, the part of global/world citizenship that interests me:

When translated into participatory action, global citizenship entails a responsibility to reduce international inequality (both social and economic), to refrain from action which compromises an individuals' well-being, and avoids contributing to environmental degradation. (emphasis mine)

It seems simple enough, but so many people have this issue where they can't even think beyond their own wants at home, not really realizing how much is going on outside in the big world.

So what's your take?

My understanding of global citizenship is actually closer to what some critics call "global-oriented citizenship". I believe that all of us, as human beings, have a responsibility to not only support and improve our own nation and society, but to help others in their quest to becoming more perfect nations and societies. All of our cultures have faults, big or small, which we need to eradicate; sometimes it takes an outsider to point it out and help to solve it.

Now, I'm not suggesting what the US likes to do, which is butt in on people's business and take away their cultures altogether. I believe with greater global interaction (such organizations like the Peace Corps and Doctors Without Borders are great for this), we can all experience a little bit of each other's culture, and find what moves us, makes sense to us and betters us. For example, I was impressed by the Italian attitude of il dolce far niente (the sweetness of doing nothing)- the understanding that it's important to take time to rest and not do anything for work or school, but just to have some classic R&R. I think countries like the US, with a "work now, play later" attitude, or Japan, where people are supposedly literally working themselves to death and dying at their desks, need to incorporate this into their culture. It's simply healthy.

Now, I'm not saying that Italian culture is infallible- there are some awful sexist attitudes that have gotten in the way of justice in the past. But that's when they can learn something from, say, Scandinavian countries, where women are socially and legally equal.

My point is this: global citizenship is the ability to teach others and simultaneously learn from those you teach. It is the ability to acknowledge that everyone on this earth has something to contribute to a greater human race, and everyone has the right to be a part of the human race.

It is, in a sense, the ability to love and cherish indiscriminately. And that's what I find beautiful.

Thank GOD It's Friday

I know, I promised a substantial blog post today, but it's almost midnight and I need to catch up on my sleep.

BUT, I will say what tomorrow will be about!

I'm going to begin a semi-series on the concept of the "Global Citizen". What it is, what it isn't, and why it's so important to try to be one.

Until tomorrow, readers, goodnight!